Thriving through Post Traumatic Stress

It disturbs me every time it happens...but the flashbacks are getting to be less prevalent.  

With my husband in the passenger seat, and my nine month old in the back, we passed a car accident a few days ago.  The accident was over.  There were several people on the side of the road.  The cars were still in situ.  One of the cars had spun into my lane of traffic.  The other was on the other side of the road.  Blocking a lane.  

I cast my eyes away quickly.  I know that such sights affect me, and avoid looking instinctively.  But my husband pointed out that he could see the airbags and I cast my eyes back to the car as we passed.  The car was sideways, straddling the middle and inside lane.  I couldn't see the damage as it was on the opposite side.  I could see glass on the road. There wasn't anyone in the car, but I could see the air bags. 

And I was brought back.  Again.  To the day of my accident...

Read the rest of this post at Anglia Counselling's blog.

Recovering from Post Traumatic Stress is a long and complicated healing process.  If you believe that you or someone you love is suffering from PTSD, please seek assistance in healing - it's very hard to do it on your own.  

Anglia Counselling offers more information on PTSD - including this Infographic.  The US Department of Vetrans Affairs has a National Centre for PTSD survivors.  Or have a look at Meg Sanity's Using Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to treat PTSD.

Image credit (edited): David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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My New Mission

I had an interesting thought the other night, as I sometime do (this is in between my regular night time discussion with myself about how weird it is that we have a room in all of our homes that we enter with the specific purpose of becoming unconscious for 6-8 hours every night.  Isn't it weird?  We are completely vulnerable - I don't know how any of us sleep.

But enough about my nighttime insomniac ramblings - I've digressed.

As you're all aware, I've tried my best to maintain a cooperative relationship with my ex - but the professionals we've been involved with have helped us to develop a parenting plan which minimizes our exposure to each other as much as possible.  Given my ex tries to ramp up the conflict at every meeting - it's better for both of us and for the children if we don't see each other.

Four Years...to the Day

Four years ago today (December 15th), I had a very bad car accident.  I've written about it before:

• I Am NOT a Survivor
• Every Day is a Gift
• Thriving through Post Traumatic Stress
• Enjoy the Sun!

Writing about it has given me some peace.  I struggle internally sometimes - because I don't like to be seen as week.  Sometimes I hold it in.  Like today.  I was in the car before I remembered the day and it's significance.  On the highway.  With my husband driving.

I Am NOT a Survivor

I am not a survivor.

Not in the sense that I'm not still among the living.  I just hate that word.  Survivor.  Sounds like I was up against something completely insurmountable that most people never make it through.  That I've been victimized.  I'm not a victim.  Not just that, but the term survivor also comes with an implication that your life is somehow less than it was or could have been before whatever it was you survived.  I haven't been through anything so tragic that thousands of people aren't doing it every day.  I made my choices, I do not regret.  I accept and move on.  

I'm a "survivor" of divorce.  

I'm "surviving" having two kids to raise with a an ex who suffers from a variety of mental illnesses.  

I "survived" a tragic car accident.

I "survived" PTSD.

Screw that.